Been a long and tiring week and I'm SFGIF (So F'n Glad It's Friday)! We are having rain and nothing but rain here in the glorious Northwet. Predictions are that it's going to continue for another 10 days. It's suggested that it could rain up to seven inches over the next couple of days in the Snoqualmie convergence zone (that'd be the area I'm now living in). Yeehaw - slap the ark together Pa, and let's take the dog and cat sailin'! Aside from the perils of driving in heavy rain (only because people will insist on being idiots), I don't mind it. I've slept so well the past couple of nights. There's nothing like hearing the rain beat down on a tin roof just two feet over head, and the river has become so huge and fast that it sounds like thunder rushing by (down the slope where it won't flood me out - quit worrying, will ya?!). So, I'm looking forward to another weekend of holing up in my studio and crafting until I can't stand it any more. In the tradition that Laura started, I'm throwing down a new Friday list here. I've always had fun sort of collecting oddball thing that people say (or just things that strike me in an oddball way), but I never thought to use them in such a fashion. So, thanks H.B. for being my inspiration. Again, this is all true speech... I heard it myself - and maybe even said it myself - but names are withheld to protect the nefarious.
“If you had been listening you would have realized that I didn’t say anything at all.”
"What?"
“Last time I checked I was still living in America, a far crappier version, but still America, right?”
“People are so finicky about the death penalty.”
“How are you?”
“I'm pretty much swirlin' the drain.”
“Keep in mind ease of navigation. My moral compass works just fine but the other one tends to spin wildly even in fits of sobriety.”
“His thinking is so constipated it’s like he had Pepto injected into his brain.”
“OMG! Who would name their dog Testes?!”
“A guy named Richard Cranium.”
“Really?”
"I would love to strafe the hell out outta somethin'... just once!"
"I had half a mind to tell him..."
"Yeah, well he's such a dipshit that it would probably only take 3/16ths."
"Are you frustrated?"
"No, just perplexed."
"What's the difference?"
"Shooting something vs. having a shot of something."
I got a giggle out of a couple of them...ok, more than a couple. I was at work the other day and it was raining. The infamous question of the day was....What is the weather going to be like? Hmmm, maybe some rain?! Or how long is it going to rain? Till the last drop falls I imagine.
ReplyDeleteHave a great weekend sis
Barb ya made me chuckle thats for sure on a few of them.
ReplyDeleteI've not said any of them well came close on "I had half a mind to tell them...."
I think the best one ever said of anyone (me included) is
If you had a brain you'd be dangerous or If their brains were dynamite they wouldn't have enough to blow their nose.