Monday, July 14, 2008

Whine Not

The news this weekend was all over Phil Gramm's declaration that we are a "nation of whiners." No, no... relax. I'm not about to wax political - *shudder* - perish the thought (although IMHO, Gramm can go pound sand).

It got me thinking. Thinking about the whiners I've known (and quickly distanced myself from) in my life. Thanks to Mom ("Stop that whining or go to your room!"), I have no tolerance for whining. The people I hang with tend to not be whiners, and if they dare so, they get the full Brunt o' Barb. "Tough up!" (thanks, John) is up there on my favorite phrases list. But, you know the people I'm talking about... every little physical ache and pain needs to be reported, every emotional stumble needs to be pronounced. Endlessly. All of the bad things that happen to them are never their fault and there's nothing they can do to change any of it. Translation: I don't want to work hard enough to change anything externally, much less work to improve my own attitude on the situation.

Fie. Bah.

Whether the physical circumstances themselves can be changed or not, attitude comprises a huge percentage of whatever issue is at hand. Chop wood, carry water. Do what you can in the best way you can and the rest will follow. Or not. But at least you'll have your dignity, and maybe some kind of sense of humor. Trust me, I've seen and been through enough to know that without those two benchmarks, it's tough to stand up at all. But it does take work.

Lest I be misunderstood. Ain't nothing wrong with asking for help. I've been on both sides of that equation. Asking is different than whining. Whining is, "I've got this thiiiiiing going on and I don't know what to dooooooooo......", and expecting someone else to figure it all out for you. Asking is, "Hey, I need your help. Here's what's happening, here's what will help. Whatever you can or can't do is okay by me." You've already analyzed the situation and decided on a course of action, and with any luck have adjusted your attitude around it. Big difference.

Tim calls "adjusting your attitude" acceptance, as in, "you need to find acceptance." It's a popular notion and definitely one that has some merrit, but I don't like the word acceptance. It's just too passive for a gal like me. Enacting an attitude adjustment is much more proactive. But, hey... whatever works for you!

So... tough up. Or go to your room.

1 comment:

  1. Hey Barb, Amen to that, I do know a few people who whine and it can drive me totally nucking futs and no that's not a typo....
    I'd love to know what "Phil Gramm" thought of the UK...


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