Twenty Questions: That's Just Not Funny!

A person who wishes to remain anonymous sent in the question: Have you ever thought of doing stand-up comedy?

The answer is, firmly, NO!!

It's not that I don't think I'm funny. On occasion, I'm actually pretty pleased with some of the humorous stuff I pull out of my magic hat - I have a good eye for quirky (the bad eye I use for staring down obstreperous children at the grocery store). It's not that I fear being on stage - been there, done that, didn't get a t-shirt, a plastic dashboard Jesus, or a free Happy Meal even.

Stand-up comedy is just something I'm completely uninterested in doing. I have no desire to stand in front of a group of strangers and fillet myself via my sense of humor and desperately hope that somehow they get it. Get me around a campfire and feed me some tequila and we're good to go. Sit back and enjoy the show.

Because, people either get me... or they don't. There doesn't seem to be a lot of gray area to swim in.

I'd love to write comedy. I think it would be great fun to develop a script for a show. I would even love to act in a comedy. I love to make funny art, and sometimes it's only funny to me. For example, I once did a self-portrait with a "poison" label slapped across my forehead. I showed it to several people and one friend, with a very concerned look on her face, asked, "Do you really think what's in your mind is poison?" And suddenly I felt as though I should be lying on a green couch, holding a box of tissues, and crying over the fate of baby harp seals, spotted owls, having ever had to wear a slip, and my certainty that the Catholic church loads those incense dealies with some lousy low-grade pot.

Of course I don't think my mind is poison! Toxic, sure. Poison, no.

Stand-up? Nuh uh. Not even if I get to sit down for it. But thanks for the compliment...

... I'm here all week.