Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Beep Beep!

Good or bad, Life doesn't issue a warning blat when it's about to send something big your way. You'd think we would learn not to be so surprised by the headlights when we continually stand in the middle of the road, but we stand there doe-eyed nonetheless. Understand, I'm neither against standing in the middle of the road (although forward motion is preferred), nor do I have a solution for being surprised by The Universe. It's who we are.

The difference between the evolved and unevolved is how we handle the unexpected. Do we stand there and let it run us over? Do we skip away and watch it zoom past? Do we grab on and see where it takes us? Granted, we often don't have a whole lot of choice. Sometimes we're simply swept up in the Great Street Sweeper and hauled along for the ride. Even then, do we acquiesce or kick and scream?

Two years ago last Saturday I met Steve. I remember the moment as clearly as if it was a scene from a movie I've watched a dozen times. I remember his blue truck pulling up to my house on the river. I remember peeking out the kitchen window at the tall guy who stepped out, two bags of dinner groceries in his right hand. I quickly opened the door and met him on the front porch where we immediately hugged each other. He smelled like sawdust, cigarette smoke, and something sweetly delicious that I've yet to be able to define.

I wasn't looking for love. I was looking for a friend. Life had other plans for me as we haven't been apart since. Life said, "Surprise! This is The One." And even though we were almost constantly together, I initially fought against the relationship, or at least the idea of it. It was all out of fear, considering that my last big life surprise before that was much darker - losing my late mate, John to cancer. I pretty much took a mental stand against Life and said, "Oh yeah? Fuck you if you think I'm going to set myself up so easily again." I didn't exactly kick and scream, but I definitely folded my arms across my chest and did my best to look stubborn.

Steve, on the other hand, seemed completely at ease with the surprise of our relationship. Kindhearted woman that I am, I saw no need to burst his bubble. I allowed myself to be swept up in the ride. It didn't take long before I saw the validity of who we were/are together. It didn't take long at all before I mentally nodded resignation and thought, "OK. I get it. This was meant. He's amazing. I'm crazyinlove."

By the way, The Universe thinks it's really funny when we accept what already is - good or bad. I mean, it totally cracks up The Universe.

What it comes down to, I think, is this:
Use your Life, or it will use you.

Either way, you're gonna be surprised along the way.

3 comments:

  1. I found me another keeper in the writings of Barb Black:

    What it comes down to, I think, is this:
    Use your Life, or it will use you.

    I guarentee THIS will stick with me and I will hear it just at the moment I need it. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jess... :-)

    Rachel... you do me great honor!

    ReplyDelete